Thursday, December 17, 2009

Rowing Across The Ocean

Scott's Tip Of The Day: An American, Katie Spotz, intends to row a boat across the Ocean for charity. Here's an idea. Why don't you get a job, Katie? Then donate some of your salary to charity. About 50 some odd people have tried this and failed. You know what that means? Coast Guard Rescue. You know how expensive that is? You're attempt to earn money for charity ends up costing the United States money and resources that could be put to much better use than rescuing you. We have a pretty big deficit you know. So why don't you grow up, stop with the row boat nonsense and get a job?

Monday, December 14, 2009

Hannukah Fail 2

Scott's Tip Of The Day: Really? Seriously?

Friday, December 11, 2009


Scott's Tip Of The Day: Supermarket FAIL. Ham isn't kosher. If you're observant enough to celebrate Channukah you aren't going to eat a ham to commemorate the occasion.

Wednesday, December 9, 2009

Top 10 Candidates for Aerosmith Lead Singer Vacancy

Scott's Tip Of The Day: Have you heard? Aerosmith is in a bad state. Steven Tyler hired his own personal manager and told the band I'm doing my own thing, focusing on my own solo career for the next two years. The only problem is Aerosmith doesn't want to wait two years to come out with a new album and tour. So rumor is Aerosmith is shopping for a new lead singer. Lenny Kravitz was one of the most talked about candidates but he shot down those rumors the other day. So who is going to be the new lead singer of Aerosmith?


10. Raffi

9. David Hasselhoff

8. Joe Pesci

7. Dr. Teeth

6. Stephen Hawking

5. William Shatner

4. Gael Garcia Bernal

3. Elijah Wood

2. Diandre Cole

1. Gizmo

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

Girly Drinks

Scott's Tip Of The Day: Straight men are not allowed to drink girly mixed drinks. So what's a girly mixed drink? Is it pink or some other fluorescent color? Yeah, if it's the same color as a highlighter it's prob a girly drink. Pina Coladas? Cococnut....Anything with coconut is pretty much a girly drink. What about margaritas? Well, margaritas have tequila. If you constantly make mention of how strong your drink is and you are accompanied by a woman, it's permissible. Can you drink a margarita with another dude drinking a margarita? No way! What about screwdrivers? Screwdrivers are OK... barely.

"But Scott, what if I am on a tropical vacation? Can't a straight guy drink a tropical drink on a tropical vacation?" Yeah, you can drink girly drinks on a tropical vacation AS LONG as your sole reason for the vacation wasn't to get away to drink girly drinks, free from criticism.

Feel free to print this post out, laminate it and use it as a reference guide.

BTW I don't know the guy in the pic I included above in this post. I just searched "girly drink man" on google pics and his pic was one of the first to come up. Poor guy. You make one mistake and it follows you forever.

Thursday, December 3, 2009

Tiger Woods

Scott's Tip Of The Day: Cheating on your wife is mean and inconsiderate. Cheating on your wife with someone uglier than your wife is just plain stupid.

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Sick Scott

Scott's Tip Of The Day: Don't expect much from Scott this week. Someone got me sick. Although I was fortunate enough to work from home earlier this week, I am back in the office, giving the gift that keeps on giving...germs. Please send your Get Well Soon cards to If I like yours, I'll feature it on my site.