Tuesday, January 5, 2010

New Year's Resolutions

Scott's Tip Of The Day: So it's January 5th. Have you made your New Year's resolution yet? Don't you think it's time? What? What are my New Year's resolutions? Good question.


1) To buy a stun gun and start shocking people who regularly use the word "irregardless"

2) To use the aforementioned stun gun to shock people for criticizing me for being too harsh in shocking people for using the word "irregardless"

3) To use this stun gun to silence people for complaining I use my stun gun to resolve trivial matters, such as silencing people who criticize me for acting in a socially deviant manner.

4) To increase stun gun awareness by zapping people I pass on the street who don't appear to be carrying a stun gun.


Jenni said...

Scott, why is it when you say the things we all are thinking, it's humorous and brilliant, but when I do the same, I get treated like a naughty 5 year old?

Maybe I'm just not full of awesome yet.

Happy Halfhearted Resolutions week!

brookeamanda said...

I've always wanted to shoot someone with a stun gun. Irreguardless, I think my New Year's resolution will be taking anger management classes.

Fairy Mae said...

This little ditty made me laugh out loud! Thank you!!