Scott's Tip Of The Day: I don't care if your girlfriend, wife or inflatable doll told you "Its not the size of the boat, it's the motion of the ocean".... she was lying. If your ding dong is microscopic then no matter how much you move it, you aint gonna be pleasin' her. So what do you do when you are about to have sex with an inebriated acquaintance and you pull off your pants and she says "OMG, your swizzle stick is SO small?"
TOP 10 RESPONSES TO LADIES INSULTING THE SIZE OF YOUR MANHOOD
10. It gets bigger, I assure you.
9. Swizzle stick? You're six-years-old, where did you learn an innuendo like that?
8. Just give me a chance, I just enrolled in a Penercize class, and after a few weeks of penirpushups, it'll be bigger and stronger
7. I'm Asian, give me a break.
6. How would you know it's small? Seen a lot of them?.....
5. When I finish this cycle of steroids it will probably return to normal size.
4. I'll have you know I won the Rhode Island Penis of The Year award in 1999, 2004 and 2007!
3. The doctors did the best they could after an unfortunate accident involving a Rottweiler and a jar of peanut butter.
2. Oh, that? That's not my penis...
1. It's not that my love pump is small, it's that your vuh-jay-jay is huge.
Depending on your exact situation, some of these responses might work better than others, but at least you will have a witty response and won't be caught with your pants down (pun intended).