Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Missile Shield

Scott's Tip Of The Day: Today the United States announced they would be scrapping their plan for a missile shield, which was to be placed in Poland and the Czech Republic. So how is America going to protect Europe from potential threats originating from the Middle East?


3. Chuck Norris
When Chuck Norris is in a crowded area, he doesn't walk around people. He walks through them. There are no weapons of mass destruction in Iraq, Chuck Norris lives in Oklahoma. Chuck Norris played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and won. Need I say more?

2. Snuggies
You won't even notice your roof was destroyed by an Iranian missile. You'll be too cozy on the couch, rocking out your snuggie.

1. Humus
Middle Easterners love Humus. Would they attack your country if you were storing the world's humus reserves? I think not.

C'mon Poland! I know most of your military tragically died after your government standardized screen doors in Polish-made submarines, but think for a second. So America isn't giving you a big expensive missile shield. So what? Follow my suggestions! They're cheap! They might just save your life.

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