Tuesday, July 28, 2009
Sense Of Style
Scott's Tip Of The Day: I've discussed the importance of style in previous blog entries. Like my post about Steve Jobs and his black turtlenecks. He wears them all the time! But at least Steve Jobs dresses within the realms of reason. So he wears the same thing every day. Who cares? So does Homer Simpson. It's better then dressing like Lady Gaga (see above picture). What's your deal Lady Gaga? Why does your blouse consist of frog stuffed animals? Are you trying to molest kids in the park? Are you trying to keep flies and other insects at bay? Quit being so weird. You don't even see prostitutes wearing outfits like that.
Lady Gaga, you sing about your desire to ride on my disco stick, but you don't even know me. I have a girlfriend. I don't want you on my disco stick. Not when you look like this without makeup. Gross! Get some plastic surgery! How come everyone in Hollywood has gotten plastic surgery except for you? Are you waiting for an invitation? I'll do it. I'm an unlicensed physician but I think, even I, could fix you up with an exacto blade, some vodka (for sterilization and anesthesia), a couple of band aids and some stitches. I'll tell you what, I'll do it for free.
So what's my point? If you're famous and you're ugly, please get plastic surgery. If you're not famous, I will perform your surgery for free. I'm a good guy, I want to do my part. It may be a little crude, but whatever. Beggars can't be choosers, right? Furthermore, stuffed animals are meant to be played with, not draped on your body like a dress. Remember that, readers. I am gonna quiz you on it later.